I doubt anyone will actually read this, but I don't mind. Just some philosophical bullshit I need to get out of my system about my 'art'.

So I've been giving a lot of thought to my art practices lately, and ultimately one of the reasons why I stopped uploading in the first place. After leaving year 12 I found myself worn out, and everytime I opened a new psd document or looked at a piece of paper, nothing has been coming to mind.

I've always thought that hyper-realism was something to aim for. I believed the more detailed my pieces looked, the more respected I'd be as an artist. With this in mind I always took on projects that were too ambitious for me. I set out to create images that would take hours and hours on end, but nothing that I really cared for. So the pieces always went unfinished blobs of colour. I never loved any of it. I realised that I was never going to master beautiful works like our favourite artists - `budgie or `Artgerm for example. So I gave up. I stopped creating altogether.

I miss creating. But I can't live in the shadow of another artist. From now on, I aim to do something I should've done when I first started. I want to develop my own style, my own practice, and not adhere to someone else's rules.

I want to create something that I feel accomplishes my goal and fulfils my mission. I don't care if it's not as detailed as it 'should' be. I will love it for all it's imperfections. If I want to use a shortcut, even if it's taboo in whatever structured practices exist - I will. I will smudge away and blur to my heart's content... Because being an artist is about utilizing the tools that you have. I may not be ingenuitive and use the tool in some new crazy way, but damnit, I will be happy.

I'm my own person, and I will pursue my own shadow. This doesn't mean I'm walking forwards... I'm walking away from the bright area that so many people have crowded in. If you want to follow me, I won't mind. Just don't cut in front.